Triggers, Feelings and Anxiety
After eliminating possible triggers in the child care environment that might initiate bouts of crying with our 4 year-old, it was time to look at other "outside" factors that might be contributing to her behavior. While these triggers may be far removed from the child care environment in terms of time and space, they can still significantly effect children's behavior.
Triggers, in and of themselves, are merely actions or events. However, children associate particular feelings with those actions and express them through their behavior. If the feelings are intense enough, they may be expressed immediately and, perhaps, dramatically. At other times, children may carry these feelings with them where they may emerge at unexpected moments in time, if at all. Anger and frustration are two feelings often associated with children's misbehavior. One other feeling, often overlooked, is anxiety.
Anxiety is a feeling of uneasiness, apprehension, fear or worry. Adults have developed skills in managing anxiety, particularly the ability to put problems in perspective. That is, being able to recognize that many problems are temporary in nature and resolutions, while not immediately evident, will likely be found. Young children are still developing the emotional skills needed to cope with life's challenges, so their anxiety often overwhelm them. What are these challenges? We need look no further than our little girl who cries. Within the last six months there had been a death in the family. A parent had lost employment. Recently, an older sibling had left the household due to conflict with a parent. On their own, each of these events might have proved too much for this little girl to manage. The combination. . . devastating.
Recognize the many challenges families face and the affect on young children. Some challenges we may see infrequently: sickness, hospitalization and death; frequent moves or homelessness; substance abuse, mental illness and domestic violence. Poverty and crime. Others more frequently, such as the time apart children spend daily from their families, separation and divorce. Where do we start in helping young children with these myriad challenges? More in my next post.
