Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Pull-Over Prophecies

In my visits to child care facilities over the years, I've spent a considerable amount of time observing children's behavior. However, I never paid much attention to what children were wearing, except to note whether their clothes were clean, in good condition and appropriate for the weather. Recently, I started to pay more attention to the messages that are incorporated into children's clothing. Many carry a statement or a label that, presumably, describes the child or the child's behavior or attitude. Out of curiosity, I started to record some of these descriptions.

Before reviewing the results of my survey of children's attire, allow me to make some broad generalizations about my observations of "child care wear". I would note that most young children wear pull-overs, which makes considerable sense due to their emerging fine motor skills and the challenges presented by buttons and zippers. Girls appear to wear more colorful clothing, such as pink or violet, that sometimes feature embroidery, sparkles or even rhinestones. Boys often wear solid colors, dark greens or blues, although camouflage or sports stripes are not unusual.

Whether or not a label or description imprinted on children's clothes represents an accurate portrayal of children or children's behavior, it often reflects care-giver's beliefs regarding those children. At one time, those beliefs might have been summed up in this way; "Girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice, boys are made of snips and snails and puppy dog tails". Unfortunately, this old adage appears to be the recepient of a modern make-over, losing its innocent quality and taking a more indulgent view of children and their behavior. According to the labels I observed on children's clothes, girls are no longer "nice" but, "Adorable", an "Angel" or a "Princess", "It's All About Me" and "Small But Feisty". Boys are no longer like "puppy dog tails" but, "Mommy's Little Monster", "No Pain, No Game", "Allergic to my Sister", a "Commando" or "Nobody Knows the Trouble I've Been".

Attitudes or beliefs can be a powerful force that affect children's behavior. If a care-giver labels children as "Princesses" or "Trouble" or "Feisty", there will be a tendency by the care-giver to treat those children accordingly. If children are treated as "Princesses" or "Trouble" or "Feisty" , there will be a tendency by those children to act that way and, eventually, be that way. Thus, the care-giver creates a self-fulfilling prophecy where their belief about children becomes reality. Therefore, be aware of how your beliefs and attitudes toward children, particularly individual children, affect your demeanor and behavior.

For me, my attitude toward my work with young children and the people who care for them is as simple as the statement I observed on one little boy's shirt . . . it proclaimed; "Life is good".